Tom Sawyer wasn’t the only one: dead people like to attend their own funerals. Come on, wouldn’t you? They tend to stand near the end of their coffin, and watch as people pass to pay their respects. They love looking at all the flowers and expressions of sympathy (so make sure you send really nice ones. Just sayin’).
While the deceased enjoy seeing all the old friends and acquaintances, its frustrating for them to see all the sadness, because they know that, “Hey, I’m STILL HERE…”
Grief is a hugely powerful emotion. It can work like a giant anchor around the spirit of a deceased loved one, keeping them (and you) from moving on. They still care deeply about us, so intense levels of sadness make it hard to leave. Kinda like a mom not wanting to leave their crying child (although, there are some crying kids you probably can’t get away from fast enough).
After our mother passed, my sister was desperate to “hear” from her. She wanted a sign,to dream of her – ANYTHING. But that powerful grief actually blocked Mom from coming through. It was like a curtain of white noise that nothing could pierce. Once some time had passed, and the need wasn’t as great, she did indeed have wonderful experiences of Mom’s presence.
Allowing our loved ones to transition is the natural order of things. It’s not easy, but if we keep in mind that they’ve just moved on to another level of existence, one that allows them to stil be with us (albeit in a different form), we’re more likely to experience their presence, either through a medium, dreams, or little “signs.” More importantly, letting them go helps them in their new life. And it allows you to continue on your own path, on this side of the veil.
I know that some cultures “celebrate” death. That’s not exactly my style, but I do try to encourage people to put their grief in perspective, to the extent that they can. You will see them (for real) one day. Trust me on this one…